Love.... in the most perfect way

The man with graveyard eyes looked blank and said
There is a woman who cleans toilets
somewhere in the deserts of California

She often sees the Messiah
while making a living in last chance gas stations
on her knees.

I could see he was trapped alone
within the privacy of his own impulses

You are my saviour he said.
I have been looking everywhere.
I arrive nowhere and I meet you here.
On a rundown deserted street corner
at the appointed time of desolation.

the embodiment of false humility
eyes cast downward
His body shrugged with insecurity.
The Gods must be angry......he whispered

Jesus punched me in the face today
It was really a tap on the brain
But when he does it. well,
It leaves a mark

Sad truths imparted often incur trifling problems
But I knew what needed to be said:
Jesus is not who he pretends to be

He laughed
it was like sunshine on the edge of hatred
at the waters of bubonic bliss

with tear soaked vocal cords he said
I must be into bondage...
hard to explain without any form of visuals
freaks me out I am a disciple of discipline

the key to understanding that thing
that can mean so many things.

Usually something else.

You are my saviour he echoed
I don't know what I would have done
If you hadn't been here NOW

(These singular moments are meant to be
as stretching to forever always is.)

Infinite solitary eternities

grounded by reality
trapped in the physicality of nothing
I smiled

if he only knew me



© 2009~SophieD

nexus

Waiting for the next line
Life as is on the fringe, the edge
the verge of something

He looked at me and said:
"You are so free...without inhibitions.
You scare me."

I don't understand your nuances yet...
but i will.

"You." he said. "You are an angel.
I am talking to an angel. Me?
I'm just trying to get my life together."

Be nice to me.
Tell me everything is going to be alright.
If it's not the truth.
Lie to me (like this was the only time.)
It makes me feel as if I am doomed.

As he gazed at me, eyes dewy from narcotic reverie,
I said, " You are trapped in a woman surrounded by women."
Morpheus wept.

"You are a chemical imbalance" he replied
"but then, all humans are."

They are all drunks and junkies and eternal losers
these men I like. I am not a forever kind of woman.

who could stay beside me long enough to spend forever with?

He looked at me and said with an air of complete bewilderment:
"I thought I knew what you were all about. But
you are not what I had you figured out to be at all."

Waiting for reaction where there is none.

We are complete rational insanity
That makes the two of us sane. (Doesn't it?)
We are all just moments pieced together
trying to make something whole.
Life is tough. Love.

Love still lingers

© 2009~SophieD

Gravitation

I thought we were all on the verge
of a nervous breakdown
For someone so tied up you are beyond out of control
with anyone, any where, why or how
there is never a reason.
He saw you consumed by his will
the fiery tumultuous ice cold volcano

We exchange laughter on the edge of hysteria
sitting together thinking under the pain
the lies tiny injustices that flow through blood
making our veins one truth
so we smile when it seems most inappropriate to do so.
those times when we should
I'm compulsive
Like I said
My life is an open shut book
some of the chapters are obscure
but it's my truth without flinching
Reality. I live it.
If I merely judged a man by what came out of his mouth
I'd be in big trouble.


We screamed at each other in public places
A romantic notion of an excuse to say fuck you
but what we meant was fuck this world
that is so devoid of life, of soul
there is no emotion anymore
We screamed at each other
same words, same thoughts
and we liked it.

There was no beginning
we never told each other what to think
both of us were already there
in some sort of unsettling happiness.
We understood each other.

© 2009~SophieD

In truth,
the only time I have ever slept with a Poet
is when I have slept alone...


It is funny those things we are forced to remember
and those which we are compelled to forget

I don't think we should talk about love.

lovemedon'tlovemedon'tlovememememedon'tlovelovelove
don'tdon'tlovedon'tlovedon'tlovemelovemelovemelove
don'tlovemedon'tlovelovelovememeloveme

I don't think that is a place that either of us are at,
Have we ever been there?
If I tell you I have love in my heart
and I believe. I believe
But my mind betrays me. Was it ever really there?
I can't tell you the answer.
I can only show you where we are.
Here, love is not here.
And if I hurt you. If I crush you
If I walk away. WHat would you call that?
That is the mind screaming to stay away.
Stay. Go away. Stay.
Don't love me. Love me. ME,
We live our lives the best we can.
I suppose the only way possible.
And in spite of everything we try to create something
that has meaning. Means something.
To me it doesn't matter for what.
It just is for the sake of is.
All it is are my thoughts
and thoughts are just the mind's way
of trying to define reality.
So you want to know what mine is?

Read my mind.


©2009~SophieD